Q. It’s so easy to download music—I have lost track of what my kids are listening to! How can I take back the control of what’s on their iPods without them rebelling against my musical standards?

A. As parents, one of our God-given responsibilities is to be the “gatekeepers” for our kids and homes. The enemy seeks to steal, kill and destroy, and an effective weapon he is using to attack this generation specifically is media.

This generation has grown up in the information age, which means they have access to anything and everything through the Internet. At the click of a button on their computers, and now on their phones, they can listen to or watch whatever the world has put on display in the privacy of their own rooms.

This is more than a parental challenge—it is an epidemic that threatens the purity of a generation. We must fight back, not from the pulpits of a church but in homes across America.

Before we talk about how to regulate music, I think we need to clarify why it is so important to help our kids make good music choices. Sometimes simply reviewing the importance of something can give us that extra determination to find a way to make it happen.

Music is powerful, and the Bible illustrates this point well: “And so it was, whenever the spirit … was upon Saul, that David would take a harp and play it with his hand. Then Saul would become refreshed and well, and the distressing spirit would depart from him” (1 Sam. 16:23, NKJV). This verse demonstrates the power of a melody, and how God has created music to move us and evoke emotions in us.

Then, when you add the power of our words into the emotional mix, a song becomes a catalyst to unlock a part of our souls in a way few other things can. Given this reality, it is no surprise that Satan, who was the worship leader in heaven before he was cast out, knows how to use music toward malevolent ends.

When it comes to regulating music, unfortunately there is no quick fix, rule or boundary that will solve this without open and honest communication. Because of the Internet, if kids want something badly enough, they can get it. That is why it is so important that we understand why and how music affects us, and create a culture of honesty and openness in our relationships.

Boundaries and standards are critical, but without relationship they are lifeless and can bring rebellion. One of parents’ biggest misperceptions is that they can’t regulate what their kids listen to and watch. While it has become more difficult than ever before, it can—and must—be done through boundaries, communication and relationship.

By: Shane Rogers, pastor of student ministries at The Church of Living Water (Olympia Foursquare Church) in Olympia, Wash.